I have not posted in a while ~ over a week. I am pretty much back into the swing of working each day. I have not yet established a good system - still feel like I am playing catch up for the two weeks I was out.
That said, I am enjoying the work and even though there is a lot more involved in teaching English rather than PE I feel like A) I made the right choice and B) I will get a system in place that works for me. One that involves being able to do things that I enjoy and are important to me - other than planning lessons and grading papers! My self-imposed deadline to have said system in place? October 1.
In the weeks since my mom died it feels like my life is, on the surface, the same. But if you go deeper it is completely different. The earth beneath my feet has certainly shifted and I don't quite feel like I have my balance yet. I am making small adjustments to make up for it, and I am confident I will end up just as steady as I was before. NO, scratch that, I will be steadier than I was before.
I feel like I am constantly standing in mountain pose - it looks so basic but is in fact so challenging. To the unfamiliar (and even to dedicated practitioners) it doesn't look like a big deal - just stand there, on your own two feet, and don't move. But the reality is much more complicated and there is so much going on in your body at a cellular and muscular level. Tens, if not hundreds, of small adjustments that play off one another so that you can stand there, perfectly still, and make it look effortless.
Or you lose your balance, take a deep breath and start all over again.